Did you just get married? Are people constantly asking you if you’re pregnant? Is it a revolving door of annoyance? Well rest assured, we have 5 easy responses to squeeze you out of the dreaded obnoxious and awkward situation that could linger for minutes.

These are methods tested and proven by us– the newlyweds.

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    • 1) “No, are you?”

      • This response typically elicits a stunned silence and look of confusion. Sometimes people may even question why you are being so nasty, to which I typically respond, “Why are you asking me if I am pregnant?”

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    • 2) “If I had a dollar for every time someone asked me that, I could retire tomorrow.”

      • Again, this typically triggers a stunned silence and look of confusion. Some people don’t catch the whole sentence, but hey– it is a long enough sentence that people eventually stop talking, and the truth never fails!

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    • 3) “Are you trying to say I am fat?”

      • Talk about an uncomfortable and bemused silence. This puts the ball back in their court, are you trying to call me fat? Do I look like I ate one too many donuts this morning? This is a great way to make someone feel uncomfortable and sneak out of the dreaded pregnancy debate.

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    • 4) “No, we are going to wait awhile.”

      • This doesn’t stun anyone, and it usually provokes more questions. However, it is great if you are ready and willing to get into a heated debate with someone you may hardly know!

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  • 5) Just walk away.

    • Questions left unanswered, maybe some feelings hurt. They always say if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.

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-R & S

Disclaimer: This may or may not work. You may also lose a ton of friends in attempting these methods. We are not responsible for friends you may lose or the results you may have. Good luck.

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